At Least They Didn’t Hang Me

Not that some didn’t try, mind you, but I fig’er I got off pretty easy when you look at the likes of Blackbeard, Calico-Jack or my namesake Kidd. Fact is that all the famous pirates you can name ended their careers at the end of an Admiralty rope. Fortunately for me, and the fifty or so Seafair-time cutthroats who preceded me as Captain of the Seafair Pirates, I’ll be allowed to simply fade away. No maroonin’ or plank-walkin’ for me, I just step down from the quarter-deck and go back to bein’ one o’ the swabs, same as the rest o’ me mates.

The Pirate’s Landing is coming fast with a new “king of villainy” to lead the pirates in the annual renewal of Davy Jones war on Seattle. Dead-Bob will still be behind the bar but the Dead Parrot Lounge will be operating under new management. My year of command is done.

• My position as the biggest, reddest, most over-dressed Captain Kidd ever is, I think, pretty much secure. (I suppose some future Captain might paint himself red from head to toe, but baring that I’m OK. — By the way, the wenches really loved the red boots.)

• My Landing was televised on all networks, chiefly because in his eagerness to be ashore first, Sandy landed head first. (Inelegant, but dramatic.)

• I’m the only Captain whose crew was heard begging NOT to be fed again!

• 23 parades, and about a hundred operations later, I’ve still got my sense of humor and my crew. (Both slightly dented but in working order.)

It’s always been said a Captain is only as good as the crew who follows the “red-coat.” I can attest that its true. The Captain’s chief job is to get out a crew. The easiest way for the Captain to do this is to make sure that there are new and novel things for his crew to do and plenty of grub & grog to keep them going on those long, long Seafair days. So, in the end, if I have had any success as Captain I owe it to my staff. I really can’t thank them enough. My principal accomplices were; Ron Paul, Chief of Staff, Kevin Craft & Pete Klasell, Masters at Arms, Jerry Williams, Quartermaster and Bob Gazewood, Chief Drinking Officer. Joining me at mid-season to fill in for my sidelined Chief, was Mike Knowlton as my third MA. I could never have handled the job without you, lads! And while not slated to share the gallows with the chief criminals, Jerry Leupold, Ed Carter, and Pat Patterson, are certainly guilty of aiding and abetting me in my villainies and thus should share in any shame or glory due my pirate crew.


HOME	Adventures With Seafair Pirates	PORTS O'CALL	PICTURE ALBUM	CANDIDATES APPLY HERE	GUEST BOOK	NEWS, LINKS, SPONSORS	PLUNDER Gift Shop